Dienstag, 28. April 2009

Feeling great

Wow, today was... awesome.

Although we had that stupid scribble class again, which I really can't stand (why am I doing it?- because of the credits >.> and because I don't have anything hard to do there) the day ended up being pretty nice.
Attended some other classes today which I normally wouldn't do. But I had training today and had a lot time on hand and to waste. So why not?
I think I'll try to do those other classes, too. The atmosphere was kinda cool and I've got nothing better to do... oO Someone please give me something useful to do ;___;

Training was hard today... hadn't had it for quite a while and sucked... really sucked. I need more practise... badly. =_= At least my sunshine (Pab) was there again. Training does always have another atmosphere everytime he's there. I know I'm way too focused on certain people but I can't help it. Just need certain people around me to feel good and comfortable around others. Pab's one of those people I can't be without. And for the last month he was missing ;___;
Was amazing having him around again. He promised to attend training more often from now on. He had that plan of decreasing his skills by not training for a while and then improving skills with me again. (Kind of at the same level then) But he realised it would take way too long for him to lose his skills xD So that one didn't work out.
And due to the fact that he's that good, he thinks everyone might hate him, even his own children (who told him so... jokingly). So I was like "Hey, I like you, why don't you adopt me?" xD And there was only one thing that stopped him from agreeing, which was the fact that he doesn't have enough free space for me. *grin* "For a girl needs to have a biiig room with much space, as stated in the principles of samurai."

Gosh he made my day by saying that xD
I told you I'm way too focused on people an that it's easy to make my day *drop*
Sorry for this nonsense and everyday kind of stuff... just needed to tell somebody o.o

Mittwoch, 22. April 2009

Today I felt again

I walked through the crisp night, when a breeze caught me and took me away...

I felt the juicy gras beneath my feet, the air between my fingers and smelled the smell of a thousand lives. I could smell buds evolving into the most beautiful flowers and smell the most breathtaking smells. I could even smell the wind racing through the fields and shaking them to twist the seeds. I smelled perfection: It was a wonderful moment. That sort you want to hold on to forever...
And then-

... I was in Berlin again. Captivated within the never ending walls of concrete, inhaling the dust of the streets, filling my lungs. I was at the bottom again,

and longed for my precious moment...

Donnerstag, 16. April 2009


I don't know where this thought comes from or by what it was inspired, but today I realised something:
By the time we begin to think not only about our own life but about life as a whole and issues like society, purposes and human beings our life begins to crumble.
We die a little every day... piece by piece, thought by thought.

And today a bigger part of me got lost. The phrase "people equal shit" becomes more and more true to me. Don't know if it's because of Berlin and the mass of people you pass day by day. Just a feeling that grows inside me and is stirred up a lot lately. (I guess I've said that quite a few times before)
Where are the good people? And why wouldn't they cross my way to make my day? It's actually not that difficult to brighten up my day... it's simple things you need no special abilities for. But instead, I die.... and die another little bit. Of course it's just minimal, but strong enough for me to feel it. Which is a little weird...
There's this feeling of wasting my time again. Time's running out and I've got nothing productive to do... that's it so far about dieing. >_>

Nya anyway...
Can't wait for Sunday to come.. gonna celebrate a Cherry Blossom festival kind of thing (dressed up as a Geisha of course) *haha* Will be awesome... and probably really hot =_=

Montag, 6. April 2009

Filling gaps

Gnah I hate being uncreative.
I'd love to blog about something important or at least something that's important to me. But it seems I've lost all my creativity outdoors in the sun... that sucks. On the other hand, not blogging at all sucks, too. ¬_¬” Hopefully I'll come up with something usefull next time... perhaps in a few days or even weeks.
For now I'm enjoying the weather as much as everyone else does. Altough I'm usually not a wanna-be-all-in-the-sunshine person. I guess many things changed this year. Somehow frightening, isn't it? Why would a winter-lover suddenly like the summer!? I can't understand. I'm weird these days :D Just accept that.

And I'm looking for a flat somewhere in Tiergarten or Moabit. Does anyone need a companion in his/her flat? ^^"" Don't wanna live that far away from everybody anymore.

Well guys, look forward to the next (hoping it will be) usefull blog entry xD